Sunday, December 12, 2010

Moment and Wisdom

Here's a couple more Reverb prompts.
Dec. 3. Moment. Pick one moment during which you felt most alive this year. Describe it in vivid detail (texture, smells, voices, noises, colors). (Author: Ali Edwards)
Hmmm...this is a tough one. I'm not sure if the moment I'm about to describe is the one in which I felt most alive, but it is a small moment that has stayed with me.

One afternoon in October, I was walking home from the bus stop. It was a beautiful sunny fall day, and I was admiring the orange and red leaves of the trees against the bright blue sky. All of a sudden, this verse popped into my head: "The earth is the Lord's and everything in it, the world and all who live in it." (Psalm 24:1). Now, that hasn't been one of my favorite verses, and I hadn't been reading Psalms at the time. I really felt like it was God who gave me that verse in that moment to remind me that I should be praising him for the beauty that surrounds me. I don't have those feelings very often; I have a very intellectual faith. So, I am always grateful when I feel like I have those reassurances of God's presence.

Dec. 10. Wisdom. What was the wisest decision you made this year, and how did it play out? (Author: Susannah Conway)
I think the wisest decision I made in 2010 was to apply to graduate school. Now, I sort of made this decision in 2009. But, the process didn't end until 2010, so I'm counting it. It's my blog; I can do what I want to. ;) The decision was a tough one for me. I went back and forth about what I wanted to do; my confidence had been shaken by my denial the previous time I had applied (for a different program); I had to really push to get all of my application materials in on time. But here's the part of the decision where I think wisdom came into play: I really wondered, "Is it even worth it to go back to school?" Because, when I have children, I plan to stay at home at least at first. So I might not have the opportunity to use my degree in the traditional sense for very long before I become a stay-at-home mom. But I finally came to the realization that I need to make the best decision for my life now because I just don't know what the future will bring. We might not be able to have children. I might stay home for a while and decide I want to go back to work. We might not be in a financial position for me to stay at home. I decided I can't let what might or might not happen in the future prevent me from being happy now. (Obviously this position can be taken to the extreme, such as not saving any money, but I'm in much more danger of the other extreme.) I'm so glad I made the decision I did. I love what I'm doing now. And, I'm realizing that there are a lot of opportunities for part-time ESL teaching and tutoring. So, it will be a great career to have if and when I have children.

3 comments:

Sallie said...

Great post! Those would be difficult for me to answer...I need to become more of a thinker.

WhitneyB99 said...

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Anonymous said...

2 words fo you Kayla - 13 years! That's how long I didn't use my MLS, while I stayed home with the kids. I wasn't even sure I would EVER use it. I thought I might be a SAHM even when the kids were older, like my mom and yours. Because, I had that degree I now have the perfect job for our family right now. I didn't know what I was doing when I enrolled at TWU back in 1991, but God sure did.

Tere