Tuesday, June 02, 2009

Eight years ago, I had no idea...

Eight years ago today Darby and I went on our first date. We saw A Knight's Tale (his parents drove us, as we were both just shy of 16!) Afterward, his parents took us to eat at McAllister's Deli. I wish I could say our first date was "magical," but honestly, it was a little awkward. We both went home and thought, "That's not gonna work." Obviously that wasn't the end of the story.

I do not believe in soulmates. I don't think there's just one perfect person for everyone out there and that if you don't meet him/her, you'll never be in love. I believe there are several people you could fall in love with, and that if your love leads you to marriage, you make the conscious decision to continue loving that person. The problem with soulmates is that if you marry someone and then meet your true "soulmate," what are you supposed to do? Leave the person you're with?

That being said, I do believe that God can lead you to a certain person at a certain time. And I definitely do believe that there was something guiding mine and Darby's relationship besides just our feelings. Eight years ago, it was not "love at first sight." (Actually, that would have had to occur 12 years ago when we met for the first time.) We didn't just "get" each other immediately, and I don't believe we've ever stayed up all night talking. (I'm not really an all-nighter kind of gal.) Don't get me wrong, we have always had a wonderful friendship, a strong attraction, and we've both experienced the "butterflies." But it used to bother me that our relationship wasn't as "romantic" as what you see in the movies or read about in books. I've even had friends whose relationships were more like that than mine. But I'm realizing more and more that our story is special, too. God brought us together again and again, and we've chosen each other again and again. There was never a sense of inevitability, a feeling that we were "made for each other," but there was an undeniable connection that got us through those awkward first dates, one year of separation, and two break-ups.

I am so glad Darby asked me to the movies eight years ago. Sometimes I'm amazed that we actually made it to where we are today. Then I remember that God helped us connect the dots from June 6, 2001 to July 7, 2007 (and beyond). I don't know that Darby is my "soulmate," but he is my lifemate, and I couldn't be happier.


Sallie said...

Why do you want to make me cry? Just kidding but that was truly a sweet post and I agree with your philosophy on soulmates and love.

Brenton and Jenna Lane said...

SWeeeeeeeeT! Funny thing is that it feels like it was only a short while ago. Life is so short!